“It’s Spring Fund Drive Time!”

Well, so, it’s spring, and we have to agree that it’s time for our favorite public radio stations to raise money. I believe it’s all bit earlier than it usually is because of the, umm…coincidence between of our tax refunds as well as the rebates, you know.

So, let’s play a game that I’m going to call…”The Public Radio Drinking Game”, okay?

Now, to get started, you’re going to need the following for two people: two bottles of water, two decent bottles of wine, a box of crackers (and some cheese, perhaps), and, perhaps something else that’s stronger than wine that you can do shots with for one hour.
And, here we go!

The first time you hear the radio host mentions the station, take a sip of wine.

The second time you hear them say it, take a second one.
And when they mention the station for the third time, do a shot. Once you recover, eat some crackers and cheese.
The first time the radio host mentions that this is all about the station, and that it’s critical that you give money, have another shot. The second time they say that, look for the water bottle, and eat some crackers and cheese. Take another shot.
You’re in good stead right now to play the rest of the game, so here we go!
For the rest of the hour, every time the radio host talks about the raising money for his (or her) public radio program, take a sip of wine.
If you’re listening to “Car Talk”, take a shot every time Tommy laughs, and if you’re carrying on with “This American Life”, take a sip of wine after every act, since as we all know, public radio listeners are elitists.
Or, so they say, you know.
The next time Carl Kasell decides to record his voice on your home answering machine, and if it isn’t yours, take three sips of wine, and two shots, and think about how your stomach is feeling right about now. Think about how far it would be to your bathroom, and what you might have in the fridge for dinner.
Now, if you’ve made it all the way through this, I’m really, really proud of you!

But, does the first one with the tote bag win?